My dear young friend,
Why I trouble myself over your domestic difficulties, I do not know. You are
exceedingly stubborn. In my time that is a privilege reserved for those of us of
sufficient age to know how to use it.
The short of the matter is this. You have brought upon yourself this
argument, and you have done so most unjustly to your wife. Is it not the case
that you have read the greatest of meanings into her every action? Have you not
found four ways to interpret her every word? And all the while you insist that
your words are to be taken just as you spoke them. This is unjust.
It is worse. It is discourteous. If ever there were words for a young man’s
education in marriage, here they are: You cannot be too courteous to your wife.
At every turn in the argument you should be as polite as you know. She will thus
be assured of your good intentions. I believe by now she has discovered your
lack of sense. If your head is vacant, at minimum let your heart overflow.
Do you not realize that she is flesh of your flesh? She is in submission to
you. Therefore you must put her needs before your own. It is your responsibility
to end this matter. You must end it with all graciousness.
The matter is one of reconciliation. In this you must understand how
reconciliation is accomplished. It is the one who reconciles who pays the price,
not the reconciled. You think not? Consider Christ, who reconciled us to God.
Did He not pay the price? You must now do likewise.
Marriage is intended by God to be life long. You therefore must reconcile.
Who is to be the author of reconciliation? You are head of the marriage, as
Christ is head of the church. As he reconciled us, so you must be the author of
reconciliation in your marriage.
There is one consolation, my young friend. She longs for that reconciliation.
However long the journey, you must begin some time; be assured of a good welcome
at the end.
Trusting you will act promptly, I remain
Isaac the alchemist